Advice for spouses

What advice do you give to spouses during time of stress? Speaking from my personal experience, here are some that I find critical in helping both my husband and I, become closer.

In stressful time, listen to each other. Instead of blaming, talk. Instead of nagging, listen. Take time to support each other rather than fight.

Firstly – Plan ahead to block time off

When our son attends school, both of us find time to ourselves for the first time. Some mornings, we have breakfast together. Other time, we just drive around and talk to each other.

Occasionally, we explore new sights and share our mutual interest, photography. Simply spending time together, whether it is to just chat over life or over mutual interest.

I discover that by spending time with my spouse just the two of us, It helps to rekindle some of those sparks once lost because of our busy life. Above all, do not take this for granted.

Secondly – Your spouse is not the enemy

Recognize that moment when you perceive your spouse as the enemy is the result of feeling unsupported. When your are in that state of mind, it is time to talk to your spouse about it.

Here is an example of what not to do

My problem is, I have the tendency to keep my emotions to myself for a while. The only time I will talk about how I feel is when I am about to explode.

Then I finally confront my husband and we both explode together. Obviously, that, is not good.

Advice – What we learn

At the end of every conversation, we often come to realize we need each other. My spouse then does his best to help me out. I finally feel better.

One thing I do learn from our experience, is that when we sit and talk about our emotions, we help each other alleviate our stress level.

I learn that by talking about my needs, my spouse then knows how to help me reduce that stress level. At the same time, when I listen to him, he feels supported. While, keeping this in mind, we are not each other’s enemies.

Thirdly – Stop nagging, respond by actively listen

The fact is we all have stress. You are not the only one stressing out. However, during a crisis, it is important to identify who has the higher stress.

When the one who suffers because of high stress, becomes non functional, the other provides the support. This key point is very crucial to get everyone through the crisis.

 Conclusive advice

I conclude that by actively listening to our spouse, we not only help each other reduce our stress level, we solve our spouse’s problems. We feel absolutely supported and henceforth, we will avoid escalating a crisis.

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Lock in and pray because drastic time warrant drastic measures. As a country, we are told to lock down and enforce social distancing. What a scary time we are in. As believers, we can do something.

Lock in and pray

We can buckle down and pray for our nation. This is the time we need to seek God. We have the ability to call on God to intervene and divert a disaster. Prayer warriors I beseech you, act now and the time is now.

When fear and worry overwhelm us, we become paralyzed. As a consequence of that we become unproductive. We can either dwell in worries or buckle down and turn to God’s ability.

Lock in then soak in God’s promises

The best defense is to soak ourselves in God’s promises. We know that everything is uncertain right now. But, we also know that God is certainly faithful. He is our pillar of hope and peace.

Remember when God’s people wondered for forty years, two pillars guided them through the journey. For example, the pillar of cloud by day and the pillar of fire by night. What did the pillars signify?

Move in God’s sight

God was with them through the journey. Although they went through the wilderness for several years, God continued to watch over them in times of uncertainty.

Why did God allow that? I don’t know but maybe they needed to learn something and grow in their faith in God. One thing we know for sure, they were never alone.

Trust in God’s sovereignty

In our sense of uncertainty, trust in God’s ability to have peace because we know God is in control. He is the light we look for at the end of that tunnel. Yet, we know, God also provide the light we need for each step of our way. Psalm 119:105 says:

” Your word is a lamp to my feet and a light to my path.”

Credit to Maranatha! Music

 Conclusion

As we conclude, let this article reminds us to buckle down and pray, to soak ourselves in God’s promises because He is faithful. We continue to trust in God’s sovereignty because when everything else are not certain, the God we believe, is in control. May you be blessed.

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Reason For Writing About This Flower

Sunflowers turn towards the sun to survive. Do you know that? Now, what is so special that I write an article on it?

First of all, I love sunflowers and they are one of my favorites, besides yellow roses, daffodils and freesias. Then, secondly, sunflowers are not ordinary flowers. Why do I say that?

Well, many women around the world love them. For instant, when you have a vase of sunflowers in your room, they catch everyone’s attention in that room immediately.

For the obvious reason, they put smiles on faces because they are bright and cheery. In light of that, I hope to draw your attention to why they are indeed special.

Interesting Facts

Let me share some interesting facts about them:

These are the 3 facts:

• More than sixty different varieties of sunflowers can be found in the world. Out of all these, the most common one is bright yellow, with dark brown centers filled with seeds.

• A sunflower head is made up of 1,000 to 2,000 individual flowers that are joined together to a base. The large petals that are found around the edge of a sunflower are individual ray flowers, these do not develop into seeds.

• At the same time, a single sunflower can have up to 2000 seeds.  A distinguishing quality of the sunflower is that its flowering head tracks the sun’s movement. This occurrence is known as “heliotropism.”

In august 2009, I grew some of these flowers myself and they amazed me. As a result, I took several photos of them.

More Facts

I planted some ‘evening Sun’ in my garden. At the same time, I also noticed many tiny flowers grew out of the base head of the sunflowers. As a result, out of a single sunflower, I got up to 2000 seeds. Yes, I had a wonderful harvest of sunflower seeds, that year.

According to science, sunflowers exist from evolution. How is this possible? On the contrary, through creative design, I see God’s hands in it. He creates his best handiwork through patterns and details.

Have you wonder at how colors blend together beautifully and how they capture our eyes in an instant? Can science explains it all?

Until you plant and observe these flowers, you may never appreciate their uniqueness and the way God designs them.

Sunflowers Turn Towards The Sun

If you remember, these sunflowers track the sun. They turn towards the source, the sun. Therefore, the flowers yearn for a source much greater than themselves.

Today, I would like to share a truth from the Bible with you. The Bible says in Matthew 6:28 – 34

“And why do you worry about clothes? See how the lilies of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you, O you of little faith? “

“But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. “

I Have Good News For You

I have great news for those who believe the Bible. God cares about you! If He takes care of the flowers that bloom today and are gone by tomorrow, would He not also take care of you?

The truth remains that when God’s one and only Begotten Son, Jesus Christ die on the Cross for our sins  John 3:16 says:

“For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.”

What Sin Have I Done?

Have you lied? Do you know, ‘white lies’ are lies? Did you covet? Do you believe God exist? For example, do you believe He creates you?

When you trust the pilot to get you to your vacation destination safely, that is faith. Have you instinctively trust in your natural ability above trusting God? Do you hoard your possessions rather than let God controls what you have?

If your answers are Yes, then you have not trust Him. Choose today whom you will serve. Is it God or self or the devil? Jesus says:

“I am the way, the truth and the life, no one comes to the Father (God) except through me.” John 14:6

He who has the Son (Jesus) has life, he who does not have the Son of God has not life. May you be truly blessed this day!

Recycled prayers are nothing new to us. Since today is declared our nation’s day to pray, I hope to address some of our thoughts on prayers. Have you asked yourself what it is? Why do we need someone to tell us how to pray since praying is talking to God.

Over the years, we read books on how to pray. Meanwhile, we rely on the sinners prayer that we recite to God for our salvation. Here’s the problem because we aren’t robots. God created us with an intent to reciprocate His love for us. What does that mean?

Declaring His name

Recycled prayers are not from our hearts

Does doing it right more important than sounding good? Why is it so important to us that we rather sound good in prayers? Does it matter if we fumble in our prayers before God? Does He penalize your child like prayers? You might have guess it right where I am going with this.

We come to God with a child like faith. We can come to God with a child like prayer.

They become religious norm

When these prayers that we recite on daily basis become a norm, we become at risk, of being spiritually dead. Some to these days, still practice them. Be careful, that at the end of our journey we lose our way.

Does it really matter if we recite our prayers after all? The Bible says: ‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart, soul and mind.’ Matthew 22:37

Can we be sincere as we recite our prayers? Yes, we can. We have to intentionally check our state of hearts, souls and minds.

How about refreshing our prayers?

Jesus said not to forbid any child from coming to Him. He opened His arms to the children. Children are not afraid to make mistakes. If Jesus welcome children to His Kingdom, would it hurt to come to Him in prayers like a child? No! Absolutely not.

Jesus does not delight in sound good prayers. He searches your heart and your soul and mind for where your love is. For where your treasure is, there will your heart be also.

Recycled prayers – In conclusion

Seek to love God with all your heart, soul and mind. Then your prayers will flow, out of abundant of your heart. He will find joy and delight in those prayers, so refreshing and pure.

United as one –A CALL to all politicians

This is a call to all politicians to stand united as one to fight corona-virus. In order to contain this critical situation, United States of America, needs to come together and get through this crisis.

The reason is very simple. American people needs you to get us through this current unexpected global crisis.

A warning to those who create divides

Two words to those who create divides; ‘stop it’! This is not about winning for either party, Democrats or Republicans. This is about the lives of all American people. The best win is when all American people get through this crisis and are healthy and doing well.

As a nation, we need to come together as one and know that we can get through any situation together. For example, if you get sick and infected with corona-virus, you need all the professionals, the doctors and nurses and healthcare workers to get you back to good health.

This is not a political fight to pick on. On the other hand, this is taking care of people regardless of what political party they are.

We can contain and get through this crisis together

Let’s follow the experts on fighting corona-virus and work closely together to overcome this health scare. One good advice to take on, DO NOT PANIC!

Then breathe deep and think. Meanwhile you can start by asking: ‘How do I prepare for this’? At the same time, ask: ‘How to take precaution’? As well as: ‘What do I need to look out for’? and ‘How do I need to keep my family safe’?

If I have an elderly and or a young child, what do I do to ensure they will be alright? The best approach is to learn to seek as much information as you can about it.

The more you know, the better equip you are. If possible stay away from crowds.

United as one so we can get through this together

We cannot get through any crisis if we have no leadership to lead us out of this. Politicians, you owe all American people a chance to trust you, with their lives, that as united, we can ride through this wave together.

Do not try but make it happen. Yes, we can do this America together. Together we can get through this!

Modern days disciples

Modern days disciples of Jesus fail to preach the Gospel. Many of believers do not feel the need to preach the Gospel of Jesus Christ either they feel inadequate or they are not equipped for the task.

The truth is preaching the Gospel is not an option but a command from God. According to Matthew 28:19-20, God says: ‘Go and make disciples of ALL nations….’

Then He went further to say: ‘baptizing them in the name of the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit, teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you.’

At the end of that verse, He promised: ‘ I am with you always, to the very end of the age.’

Why do modern disciples today fail to preach?

The disciples today fail to connect with God. We go to churches and listen to the sermons. Our task every Sundays is to sit and listen to a feel good sermon. Then go home and get ready for our week ahead.

Unless we make the deliberate action to act, we do nothing. We listen to messages preach from our pastors.

The job of the pastors is to preach, and ours is to listen. The idea that because pastors are equipped to preach and teach, therefore, believers can sit back and let their pastors do the job.

Preaching the Gospel of Jesus Christ belongs to all disciples. Preaching the Gospel is different from Sunday sermons. Sharing the Good News of Jesus is to deliver the message of salvation to all.

The failure to understand what the Bible says, and the disconnection from God are the reasons why we as modern disciples fail God.

The lack of boldness is disbelief

If only we understand the authority that God gives us to preach the Gospel of Jesus Christ. We as disciples have power and authority over the unclean spirits. That same power given to the New Testament disciples is the same today. Do we understand that?

Until we understand and digest it, believe thereof the power that is given, we need to act in faith and connect ourselves to God, do as He commands.

Therefore, go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit. Then teach them to obey everything God commands.

Justice and deceit do not mix

Justice by definition according to Dictionary.com is the quality of being just; righteousness and or just conduct. Whereas, deceit is purposeful falsehood. Being just runs contrary to deception.

For example, ‘In God we trust‘, says it all. If America strongly believe to this day that ‘In God we trust’ is how we are going to run our nation, then there is no room for deception in our system. Why? In God there is no deception.

As a nation we need to crack down on acts of deceit. Let us begin where justice requires. If American people are going to trust our governmental system ever again, then our government has to prove that our system is just without deceit.

Where do we begin?

That is a good question! We have to begin where the ‘untouchable’ are no longer untouchable. Then, our government prove us, the American people, that there are no one truly above the law.

When the criminals found guilty of crimes are indicted. Regardless of what status or high ranking, individuals work for the government.

When none gets away by deceit

America can no longer afford to turn a blind eye to corruption. If we are indeed standing together with justice, we can no longer allow individuals to deceive and get away with it.

For indeed if in God we trust, and God is just, we will pursue truth. Above all, it is only by bathing in truth that America will dwell in freedom. Without seeking the truth, we will never be set free.

In conclusion

Let justice prevail. The only path to a just system is to eliminate corruption and leave to room for deception. Any other path will lead us nowhere. Finally, only truth will set you free.

Justice and deception cannot therefore rein as one.

Year End Personal Reflections

The year is coming to an end for 2019 and I took sometime to reflect on this year. I am thankful for how God kept us in check several moments throughout the year. The blessings that I personally received because we made a decision to put David in Yokomi Elementary  (Science and Technology Magnet) School. In light of that, let me begin.

Year End Hindsight – God is awesome and wise

For instance, in hindsight, as I reflect on the year, I realize the wisdom and goodness of God is beyond our understanding. What do I mean? We made a decision to put David in a public school.

Did we have a choice? On one hand, we could in fact continue with CAVA (our homeschooling option). On the other hand, I could continue to struggle taking care both David’s schooling and my father-in-law’s needs.

The two years of working through both, got me feeling exhausted and a need to change our plans. In reality, we did not have a choice. We had to either change of course of plans or I died exhausted. We got to do something different. As a mom, I was stubborn.

I felt unless David got to attend a good public school or I would persist on our original plans. I would bit my teeth with grit and get him through his new school year. In retrospect, it was never a good plan and God knew it.

God in His wisdom intervene and gave us the best. Long story short, God made an opening possible for David to attend Yokomi Elementary. We grabbed it and the rest was history. What an awesome blessing!

This decision we made, with God’s blessings, gave both me and Dan, my husband, precious time together. We did not see the benefits of that decision we made until much later. It was like God knew we need it.

Personal Blessings and more

There were two major highlights this year, personally for me. David was given two free tickets to Big Fresno Fair in October. Above all, I got to ascot him to the Fair.

After being here in Fresno for about 11 years, believe it or not, it was my first trip to the Fair just as it was for David. However, he had to write a journal on his experience to the fair. It was amazing by the way! Needless to say, we had a great time there ( daddy was not there).  Shhsh..

On December 13th, the day before David’s school closed for Winter break, Mrs Giometti gave me the opportunity to chaperone David’s class for a field trip to watch Nutcracker at Saroyan Theater in Fresno.  It was another amazing experience I truly enjoyed and I was thankful for it.

Did I anticipate all these when we made a decision to put him in a public school? No, absolutely not! Through it all, we learned that we should not take our time together for granted.

In conclusion, we had to learn we need to make deliberate decisions to make time for ourselves if we are going to survive, not just for our marriage but also our family. So we have to consider taking care of ourselves before taking care of another.

Is Trump impeached or is he not?

‘Trump is impeached!‘ The media appeared to celebrate together with the House Democrats this week. On the night after the House Democrats voted using 2 articles of impeachment to impeach the President and passed it.

This headline ‘Trump is impeached!‘was echoed by several media and reporters from Washington Post appeared to celebrate saying: ‘Merry Impeach-mas!‘ that night the House passed the votes to impeach him.

The Day after

After that celebration, House Speaker Nancy Pelosi held a Media conference, to announce her decision to withhold the 2 articles of impeachment from the Senate.

She attempted to use the ploy to force Senate to comply to her demands for a fair trial to impeach the President. Meanwhile prior to that, Minority House Republicans complained about how unfair the impeachment inquiry process was.

However,   An article from Bloomberg cautioned the House Speaker to forward their agenda, because any delay could cost Democrats disastrous outcome. At this point, we could safely conclude that as long as the House Speaker continue to withhold the articles of impeachment from the Senate, our President was and is not impeached!

Has the ‘Hate for Trump’ triumph?

Above all, is this the end of Trump era? I would like to think not. Listen to me. Despite the controversial clashes between Democrats and Republicans, the people of America gotten some good lessons out of this conflict. How? Let me explain.

‘Drain the swamp!’ This signature promise got Trump elected in 2016. He won over Hillary Clinton and became our 45th President. Today he fought hard to drain that swamp.

Who are the swamp? That is a great question! Now, let me explain how the route to impeachment started. Shortly after his inauguration, Democrats accused the President of colluding with Russia and because of that, he stole the 2016 election from Hillary Clinton. Democrats got angry and demanded for his impeachment.

As the result that, Mueller’s investigation began. Subsequently, America held this man responsible for the truth and He spent 2 and a half years trying to find what happened.

Meanwhile, Mueller’s report came out and found no evidence in Trump colluding with Russia. However, several of his associates and advisor received sentences with months to years of imprisonment. Mueller concluded his report on one questionable key point. Was he guilty of ‘obstruction of justice’? He left that to Congress to decide his fate.

 Was there anything good that came out of Trump era? Let me elaborate why I thought there was. For instance, out of this conflict, we had Attorney General William Barr whom I came to respect. In addition, 3 years into Trump’s presidency, we found out some truth.

Through Barr, we learned from Inspector General, Michael Horowitz’s report, after investigating the origin of Mueller’s investigation that what we thought would never happen, happened.

So, what did we learn? We had evidence that our system got rigged.  FBI & CIA, attempted to take our President out of the office through deception and corruption. There was possible collusion between DNC and FBI against Trump’s campaign.

Opinion – Unless United States government convicts its people that wrong is corrected, that justice prevails. No American will ever trusts the justice department. Similarly, this interference intercept by FBI cannot happen again. Most of all, no future President should have to go through this.

At the same time, we also learn biased Media against our President exist and they manipulate. We discover how the media brainwash the citizens. The Trump era teaches us the need for critical thinking and the need to trust our instinct.

For instance, the average people got to know what fake news are. They are better at identifying what are facts now from those that are not. They realize that speculations are not facts. Similarly, they are aware that conspiracy theories are dangerous.

In conclusion, whatever the outcome is, people have grown in their way of seeking the truth. They will be smarter and not easily manipulated in the future.

Should ‘Hate for Trump’ triumph? No! I hope not. If America succeed in impeaching a President based on their hate for him, without any substantial evidence of wrong doing and got convicted, America is doomed. What is the future for our next President?